Living by the Golden Rule...

He answered: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"  Luke 10:27

Last night I read this wonderful blog post about how you are enough for your children, they do not want or need perfection.  Here is the link http://powerofmoms.com/2012/04/your-children-want-you/ .  The insightful words in this post have resignated with me and really made me start to think.  From the time we're little (at least those of us who were raised Christian) we're told to live by the Golden Rule.  Well, I can honestly say I try to and that's part of my problem.  As a growing Christian, I am constantly trying to love my God with all my heart, soul, and strength. This is a growing and learning process which I have discovered I will never master on my own.  I have to let God lead me.  It often feels like I am taking two baby steps forward and one giant step back- a giant game of Mother-May-I, which constantly shows me how broken I am, and how in need of God's GRACE/ FORGIVENESS/ LOVE/ HOPE/ MERCY /
HEALING  (the list could go on and on) I am.  However, it is the second part of this verse I want to ponder on today.

'Love your neighbor as yourself.'

I shamefully and honestly say I do this.  I am just as critical, judgemental, opinionated, closed-minded, and hate-filled towards others as myself.  I know those words sound harsh, but in many ways they're true.  I judge others like I judge myself and I can tell you, like you all, I am my harshest critic!  On a regular basis, I mentally rip myself a new a****** for not living up to society's idea of perfection.  I  often don't even realize I'm doing this.  I'll look in the mirror and think, "If only my boobs were bigger, my nose smaller, etc, etc."  Or I'll go to a friend's house and I'll think, "Why doesn't my house smell this fresh; how come I can't manage to get our clean laundry folded and put away- it's always sitting in a basket in our family room."  Or I'll read an article about a woman who is a mom and teacher, just like me, but in her spare time is training to try out to be an olimpic marathoner and I think, "What the hell is wrong with you, you barely work out once every two weeks!"  So my lovely friends and neighbors, I am loving you as myself and that's the problem!  We live in a society that is so concerned with perfection we have forgotten that we are all broken.  No matter how hard I try, I am never going to live up to what my ideal is and if I keep "loving" others with this ideal in my mind, I will die a bitter, hateful, negative, lonely woman. 

After really pondering this for the last 20 or so hours, I have realized it is through the first part of  the Golden Rule that you can achieve the second part.  Without accepting and realizing that I cannot live without God's GRACE/ FORGIVENESS/LOVE/HOPE/MERCY/HEALING, etc., etc., etc., and accepting these gifts from HIM, I will never be able to approach my neigbors with GRACE/FORGIVENESS/LOVE/HOPE/MERCY/HEALING. 

However, in the meantime.... (forgive me Jesus!) I am rewriting the Golden Rule to remind myself of the direction my loving needs to take.  Andrea's version is this:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; "Love your neighbor like your dog loves you: unconditionally, in your face, and passionately."